I heard the song “Radar Love” the other night, and it got me thinking. If you’re not familiar, the song is about a guy who gets a radar-type signal from his woman that she needs to see him, so he drives all night to get to her. At one point, the singer notes that, thanks to radar love, they “don’t need a letter at all,” which I always thought was a reference to the song “The Letter,” which features a man who gets a letter from a woman demanding his presence immediately. (This requires him to “Get [] a ticket for an aeroplane, ['cause he] ain’t got time to take a fast train.”)
Anyway, I realized how out-of-date “Radar Love” is. In this day and age of cell phones and free long distance, not to mention the internet and instant messaging, the lonely and lovesick don’t need telepathy anymore. Or maybe you can look at it a different way and imagine that Golden Earring was prescient. Maybe they imagined some type of futuristic messaging system that would bounce off radars and send missives to faraway people.
That thought reminded me of a Yes song I’ve mentioned I don’t really like, “I’ve Seen All Good People.” There’s a line in there that goes “Send an instant karma to me/ initial it with loving care.” (That’s Yes, as in, Yes, prog rock was weird.) This always makes me think of email. It’s bizarre to me to imagine some acid-addled guitar nut dreaming up the world wide web.
But this whole thing got me musing about other classic rock songs that are technologically out-of-date, or otherwise would have to use references to modern technology if they were written now. (An aside: One day, will we hear “Doctor My Eyes” in an ad for LASIK surgery?)
Some suggestions for lyrical alterations:
The Police, “Every Breath You Take“: “Every friend you make/ on your MySpace page/ In every Facebook group/ for you I will snoop…”
The Beatles, “Let It Be“: When I find myself in times of trouble/ Mother Mary IM’s me/ LOL 4evr, let it B…”
The Beatles, “Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band“: “We’re Dr. Neil Clark Warren’s eHarmony band…”
Tommy Tutone, “867-5309/Jenny“: “Jenny, Jenny, I used caller i.d. block/ But you star-69′ed me and gave me a shock…”
Manfred Mann, “Do Wah Diddy Diddy“: “There she was just a-walkin’ down the street/ singing do wah diddy diddy dum diddy do/ I put an ad on craigslist and I said I’d like to meet/ singing do wah diddy diddy dum diddy do…”
Joan Jett, “I Love Rock ‘n’ Roll“: “I love rock ‘n’ roll/ download another song into your iTunes library/ I love rock ‘n’ roll/ Put in your iPod earbuds and dance with me…”
Other suggestions?